Flower power.

I'm a thief!

And an out of breath one too.  I've run all the way home.  All the time looking over my shoulder and waiting for a hand to land on my shoulder and a voice to say: "Stop! Thief!"  But it didn't happen, I'm home safe with my booty!

I didn't set out to steal anything.  Honestly.  I was just out for my usual walk with my trusty accomplice (the hairy four-legged one, aka, Rusty) and something came over me...

It's a lovely day and we didn't deviate much from our usual route.  We crossed the main road, holding up all the traffic, went through the turnstile and into the park.  I decided to take the path that runs along by the river, Rusty might like a swim today, or just a paddle in the water.  I might even join him, but just up to my ankles, I'm not as brave as him!

It's a couple of weeks since I walked down this path and I noticed today how over grown it has become.  The shrubs and trees on the river side are so tall now, that they bend right over and make a tunnel for me to walk through.  The high bank on the other side is very overgrown also, with the grasses and wild flowers so tall that Rusty would be lost forever if he went into them.  It's all very colorful tho' with an abundance of wild flowers that I don't remember seeing the last time I walked this way.

Rusty had a paddle and a vigorous shake when he came out of the water, leaving me covered from head to toe in river water.  Oh well, the sun will dry me.

Just as I came up from the river bank, it got quite noisy.  It took me a minute to figure out what was making all the noise.  A grass cutting tractor was making its way up from the bottom of the park, heading for the bank where I was now standing.

A thought struck me.  Oh no...

I jumped behind a tree for cover.  Rusty thought this was a great game, and barked loudly to show his appreciation.  Lucky the noise of the tractor was louder than the barking of a very excited small dog.  I let the tractor go by.  I will have to be quick.  He has to go to the other end, make a wide circle to turn and then make his way back down to where I am.  That will give me a couple of minutes.  I jumped out of my hiding place, a very large tree, with Rusty showing greater appreciation of this new game by jumping round in circles and barking even louder.

I was really quick, darting about, picking the best of the crop, one eye on the tractor one eye on the booty and trying to keep Rusty under control.  Next time I am gong to steal something , I'm gong to work on my own, you just cant rely on an assistant who makes lots of noise and wants to pee on your hiding place!

I just finished my crime as the tractor turned.  Phew, I don't think he, the tractor driver, saw me.  But I can't be sure.  I started to run, and kept running until I got all the way home.  All the time looking over my shoulder and waiting for the hand to grasp me...

My booty?  These lovely wild flowers:

Actually, I should call myself a savior not a thief, because if I hadn't rescued them, the tractor would have finished them off...

The footballer, the tattoo and the haircut

It rained today, very annoying.  I was just getting used to that yellow shiny thing in the sky.  Hopefully it will be back tomorrow.

Can't sit outside, cos all the garden furniture is wet, so I'm watching the football instead.

Well I've been watching all along, on and off.  Or reading a book with one eye, and keeping the other one on the game.  You can see a lot with just one eye...

Being a girl and not understanding the offside rule, fouls, tactics, tackles, substitutions, penalties or anything else that's going on in the game, I have to have something else to keep me occupied while watching.  So I've decided to assess the teams, and award points obviously, in a number of different categories.

So here goes.

Singing loudly and proudly while their national anthem is being played is the first category.  This is a no-brainer. Chile wins that one, they even keep singing when the music has stopped!  Brazil was a close runner up. (Well I suppose being the host team they would have the most singers available).  I could have sworn that I heard 'The Fields of Athenry being sung at one game, but that could have been just wishful thinking....

Colour co-ordination of the team strip is the second category.  The Dutch win that one, obviously, because Orange is the New Black!

There are a few more minor categories to be awarded, including who has the most amount of different coloured boots on one team.  That one is still under review because they don't stay still long enough for me to be able to count. (I did see a pink pair of boots on one player but I forgot to take note so I have to keep watching the tournament before I can award him his prize...)

And not forgetting the officials, there is a category for 'Best Flourish' when awarding a yellow or red card.  That too will have to wait until the end of the competition to be awarded.  We decided to ditch the 'Awarding Penalties for best Dive' category as there are far to many to choose from.

So now to the top awards.  The penultimate award is in the category  'Team with the Best Hairstyles'.

And I am pleased to announce that the winning team in the this category is:  (insert drum roll, or appropriate music)

CAMEROON!  With the individual award going to:  Charles Itandje

Now we are down to the the last category, and this one was very hard to judge.  I wasn't sure if I should award the prize for quantity or quality?   And should there be sub-categories for say, placement and/or colour and/or size and/or design?  Or should there just be one award for best coverage?

And now the results that you have all been waiting for, the ultimate category/award.

The winner in the 'Most Tattooed Soccer Team' category, goes to....

All of them!  I can't decide.  There are too many of them.  At the moment Brazil are playing and eight of the eleven players on the pitch are sporting 'ink'.  I find it fascinating.  What's the attraction?  Is it compulsory now for a footballer to have a tattoo?  Does it make you play better?  (And as a side note, there could be a category for 'Best Hairstyle and Tattoo', because they both seem to go together. The hot contender for this award, if there was one, could be Raul Meireles from the Portuguese team).  So many questions and so little un-inked skin!

Maybe I should go and make tea,  is it half time yet?  Cos that's what half time is for, isn't it??

Strongly worded letters!

Another beautiful day in Dublin.

Today, feeling better, I'm outside in the sun.  But I'm not reading.  I'm playing Scrabble.  On my iPad. A bit of a favourite passtime in our family.  No matter the age or spelling ability (ahem!) many an evening has been spent 'passing and playing'.  But we don't just use technology to play.  We do still take out the board on occasion and sit around a well used table and pour over the dismal letters we have drawn out of the well worn red velvet bag... (sometimes, we pour a drink too, but only when the players are of age of course).

It can get quite competitive. Words are frequently challenged, and time wasting tactics are frowned upon.  Loudly.  And as for leaving a triple letter score open for my Mother, especially when she has a
'Q' in her possession, well that's is a hanging offence.

So, out in the sunshine, the computer as my opponent (due to the lack of Brennan's available at the time) I was a bit behind.  But not to worry, I like a challenge.  A few minutes spent thinking and I got a 'Z' in on a double letter!  That put me slightly ahead, I'm on the up!  Not many letters left now, but I spot an opportunity to make a word and get rid of all my letters in one go.  And it had a triple letter and a double word tile which would give me a score of 35 and make me the winner. Woo Hoo!

I place my letters, press play and wait for the computer to add up my score and to say congratulations to me.  But wait..

That annoying white box, which tells you that your word is incorrect has popped up!!  What?

John McEnroe is shouting in my ears.  "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS".

I checked my spelling! That's how you spell the word, I should know, it would be very embarrassing if I couldn't spell it.  I feel a strongly worded (excuse the pun) letter to the Scrabble people forming in my head.  How can a game that lets you put in words like zo and za not allow this word?

I tried again, just in case (dodgey spelling ability in mind). Placing the letters carefully, making sure I hadn't put them in the wrong way round in my excitement the last time.  Pressed play, watched the computer counting up to 35, held my breath, victory was in my grasp.  No!!  Again the little white box popped up.  This time I read very carefully what the pop up box said.  It read:

"Sorry, this word does not appear in the English dictionary. Please try again."

John McEnroe is shouting even louder...

The word I placed on the board??  It was the word IRISH!!

A good book?

I haven't been very well these past few days.

In fact, I have had the worst cold that I can remember having in a long time during one of the nicest weeks, weatherwise, that we have had in a long time.  How very annoying!  Anyway (my favourite word) I found my self not wanting, or being able, to do anything but lie around. And not even outside, in the sunshine,where I normally like to plank myself with a book when the weather is good. So I stayed inside, on the couch, and read.  Amazon must have known that I was in the mood for reading as, by chance, they sent me an e-mail with a list of six books that I could download onto my Kindle app, for free!!  What luck.  Or, are Amazon turning into Google, who always seem to know exactly what I want before even I do, and send me pictures of covers for my garden furniture, or new digital scales that I might need for my kitchen.  How do they know that I leave my furniture out in the rain and that I like to bake cakes using a very old scales that never weighs anything correctly??  But, I digress.  So, while I was downloading my free, very educational and intellectual I'm sure, books, I decided also to look for and buy one that I had been hearing great reports about.

Unraveling Oliver!

Anyone read it?  I just did.  And all in one go!  Only took a few hours...

As I am (still) working at home, I get to listen to the radio all day.  Two of the presenters that I regularly listen too are avid readers and are always reviewing and recommending books.  One of the presenters Rick O'Shea (yes, that's his name) is trying to read 100 books in a year, and is on number 48 I think at the moment.  So I suppose you could say he is well read, and he is always recommending stuff.  The other one, Ryan Tubridy, reviewed a book, a while ago now, by Joseph O'Connor, Ghostlight, which I tried to read and gave up on because it bored the pants off me!!  But that can happen, not everybody has the same taste. But they both agreed on Unraveling Oliver.  And it is written by an Irish author. Ah sure what more could you ask for.

So armed with my box of tissues, a hot lemon drink, and the cushions arranged behind my back (and chocolate) I read it.

Well, the same thing happened last year when I read that other book that everybody was highly recommending, Gone Girl.

I now need to change who I listen to on the radio, or get a job outside the house where I can't listen to the radio at all!

Or else, I need to change the style of books that I am reading, because I was very disappointed by both of those books.  I thought Gone Girl was great, until the ending.  And I thought Unraveling Oliver was good, until the ending.  It wasn't very long and it was easy to read, hence reading it all in one go, but I feel cheated!  I don't want to give anything away in case you haven't read it, and like me you can read all the reviews before you buy, and it's all a matter of taste.  Perhaps you should read it and make up your own mind...

Maybe I have been programmed to think that books should have a happy ending, and I just need to be reprogrammed!  Or maybe I just need to eat more chocolate!

Anyway (ha) it's time for bed.  Anyone got a good book they can recommend...

Mobile music.

I'm on the train.

The train to Cork that is.  I'm on my way to see the legend himself, Mr Bob Dylan, who is playing at the Marquee tonight.  Last week I won tickets to see another legend in the music industry, Ms Dolly Parton, who was also playing in Cork.  But, as I was working and had time off to make this trip already booked, I couldn't go.  So being the very generous daughter/sister that I am, I gave the tickets to my mother and sister.  Turns out, they were VIP tickets, and the ladies were treated to access to the VIP lounge (which allowed them access to the VIP toilets, to which there was no queue, oh the luxury!) free drinks, great seats and a brilliant performance.  (Big sigh!!)  I don't think Bob will be affording me the same treatment tonight, except for the brilliant performance, I hope!!

Anyway, before I got on this train, I travelled to the station by the Luas.  That journey lasted 30 mins.  And for the whole journey I, along with the rest of my travelling companions, we're treated to a one sided conversation by a very loud spoken 'gentleman' on his mobile phone.

I could probably write a three act tragedy that would bring the house down and leads to a standing ovation from the side of the conversation that I heard.  Actually, it could probably be a one man show as I don't think the person on the other end of the line (Maggie) ever got a word in.  I won't bore you with the details, but it was the usual scenario that makes up a good tragedy.  Man loves woman, man drinks Bulmers (only had one), man hits woman, man professes undying love for woman, man gets adamant and is never going to speak to his brother again, man gets angry and curses woman, man swears undying love for the Pybald, man promises he wasn't in the pub, man swears he is on the Luas on the way home, man gets remorseful and professes undying love for woman, man swears he didn't kick the dog, man promises he will bring his brother to rehab, man asks what's for dinner...

Maybe it should be a comedy!

I was very glad to get off that train and get on to this one.  Lots of empty seats and a very quiet carriage.

Then it started.

Woman from Kerry rings home and has a conversation with 'Julia'.  Julia is now aware of the Kerry womans ETA and pick up point, as am I! Julia now knows about Kerry woman's two trips to TK Maxx in the city and how one branch, the big one in Blanchardstown, was great and the other, the one in Henry Street, was useless.  Julia also now knows, as do I, about Sean's vegetable and flower plot and how he has concocted a very convoluted way of irrigating and heating the plants that even Monty Don (who??) wouldn't be able to follow...

Seriously?

I too made arrangements by phone to be picked up.  But I did it very quietly, using my phone, but by sending a text.  Nobody else on the train heard...

My nephew made this same journey last week, and when he arrived he complained about a fellow traveller playing loud music.  I think I'd prefer loud music now rather than mad conversations.  Kerry woman is still talking, but Julia is long gone, she is chatting now to a stranger who picked the wrong seat.

I'm going to (try to) read my book now and maybe I'll get lost in mystery and murder, before I'm actually up for committing one!

Ah...The World Cup

Glorious day in Dublin today!

But that's enough about the weather.  Now, unless your living under a rock (and there's no WiFi under there) you will be aware that the World Cup starts today.

The World Cup of Soccer that is.  Not the World Cup of Cheese Rolling, or Kaninhop (Bunny Jumping), or Bog Snorkeling, or Cardboard Tube Dueling, or Moustache Growing.  (And yes, they are all real sports with real competitions!)

The matches start tonight, if you live in Europe, or this afternoon if you live in eh... that other place.

So, Twitter has been keeping me informed all day with predictions on who is going to beat who, who is likely to win and who I should put my hard earned cash on etc.  I haven't decided yet who I'm going to cheer for, because I'll have to wait until I see which team has the best legs...

Apparently, that's what the Daily Mail, or was it the Sun, thinks we, females, are interested in when the football is on.  They also think that we don't know what the offside rule is.  Seriously?  Of course we know what that is.  That's what happens when you are in a shoe shop and you spy a pair of shoes and somebody else spies them at the same time and you have no money and somebody has to throw you a purse with money in it and you can't move until the purse has been thrown or then the other person wins.  Correct??  Well, that's how it was explained here:

http://www.hibs.net/showthread.php?248338-How-to-explain-the-offside-rule-to-women

Although why you would be queuing up at a till to pay if you had forgotten your purse is beyond me...

Anyway, I have also been treated to a list of things I could do (if I'm female) instead of watching the World Cup, including:

Fleeing the country (what country are they not showing the World Cup in??)
Learning a language
Rent a chick flick
Join a gym

And bizarrely enough

Buy a One Direction CD and blast it to the neighbours!  (Apparently it will drive the soccer supporters away).

I have also been given some useful tips for skiving off work to watch the matches, including:

Feigning injury
Calling in sick
Find somebody to replace me (obviously a female as all the other males will be busy watching)
Invent fictional relatives who's funerals you have to go to

All of the above sounds like quite hard work to me.  It would be easier just to watch the football.  And that's exactly what I am going to do.  I'm quite looking forward to it actually!

Of course, that's nothing to do with the picture of a very handsome looking Argentinian team that was posted on Twitter a short time ago...

It's only words.

Hello. Me again.

Glad you enjoyed my ode to the fly (again).  It was nice to hear that so many people missed me and were glad to see me back, even if it was a re-hash of an old post that I made my come back with.  I don't know why I stayed away.  Laziness I suppose.

Anyway, I read something today that made me think again of something else I had written about awhile ago.

Today, I read that the word 'adorkable' is now in the Collins dictionary.  As voted in by Twitter users.  (I'm a twitter user, and I don't remember being asked to vote!)  'Jorts' and 'twerk' have also been added to the Oxford dictionary, in case you're interested?!

I watched a television program about language changes recently, where a couple of 'boffins of the English language pointed out how our language has changed over the last few decades.  Fair enough, that makes sense, I have trouble with the stuff Shakespeare wrote all those year ago.  They, the boffins, also told me that in a hundred years nobody will understand what we have written today.

A hundred years??

At the rate we are adding new words to our vocabulary I don't think we will have to wait that long.  I already have trouble understanding the person of the younger generation that lives in this house with me.  When I disturb him by asking a simple question (for example:  "How are you?")  I get such responses as:  "Effort!!  You're wrecking the buzz Ma!!".

And don't get me started on the over use of the word 'like'.

With that in mind, and in case that, a hundred years from now, somebody is reading this post, I though I would write in the style of today.

So, like.  Bored, actually!  Squee, like! (emoji)  Bored cos I'm, like, on an enforced digital detox.  Effort!  Enforced detox cos the WiFi is down.  Did I tell you, like, that I was at a gig at the weekend with the folks, and my Dad was, like, srsly bad twerking to 1D, I was literally, like, morto,   (Unlike!!!)  So, going now for some retail therapy, like, with my hunz.  Might buy some flatforms or cake pops, oh ya, deffo cake pops, cos they are, like, buzzworthy.  Tho', like, if I do buy anything I wont' be able to selfie as my phablet is out of credit.  Effort!  It's enough to make you. like, vom! (emoji, emoji, emoji)  Deffo doing the streetfood while I'm out.  Like.  SERIOUSLY!!  Bored, (emoji, emoji...) xoxo

Imagine Shakespeare reading that!  Although he could probably turn it into a three act tragedy very quickly. And I wouldn't like to be an English teacher trying to correct it.

I read a quote on Twitter today from somebody who speaks English very well, the Queen of England!  She said "There are no 'Americanisms', there are just mistakes." Could she be considered adorkable?

Would love to stay and chat, but I have a dinner to make, a dog to walk and some twerking to practice...

Ode to a fly, revisited!

Hello!

I know I haven't been here for a while (did you miss me?) and I know what I am posting is not new (sorry!).  But!  Having spent the last hour reclaiming my window ledges from the hoards of flies that have decided to use them as their last resting place, I thought this 'poem' deserved another outing...

Ode to a fly!

Could somebody please tell me why,
at the end of the short life of a fly,
when they can go here or there
or in fact anywhere,
that they land on my window ledge when they die?

They really are such a pest,
when on my ledges they get laid to rest.
And they bring all their friends
the procession never ends,
and they really put my nerves to the test!

So a solution to this problem I must find.
And, I already have something in mind!
I'll try employing a spider,
to make my ledges tidier,
then my problem will be an eight legged kind....